“Find the thing that pisses you off the most, and then fix it.”
That’s usually my first line of advice to anyone who asks me about how to discover their passion, and also what led me to mine. As an entrepreneur I’ve found this approach – harnessing my emotions – particularly useful because it bolsters my motivation beyond financial income. That is not to say that money should not be a motivator in business, but focusing primarily on money is also a great way to destroy a brand when the bottom line makes us greedy, reckless and disheartened when our income isn’t ideal. Moreover, we’d emphasize logic only and deny the value of intuition; and we’d forgo partnership and get caught up with fierce, unnecessary competition. Instead, I have learnt that it is prudent to allow our emotions to be involved in creating, developing, managing and sustaining our businesses. But, I can also understand why initially that might sound counterintuitive.
Why? Well largely because there’s a very prolific narrative that women perform poorly in business due to being emotional. That narrative is often used as a means to justify why women are denied leadership positions, projects, investments, opportunities for growth, etc., at a rate that is alarmingly higher than our male counterparts in the current business paradigm. This notion is so clearly biased and shallow however, that a man and woman can demonstrate the same behaviours, such as raising their voice in a business meeting, but the two would be labelled stark emotional opposites: the man – a strong, firm leader who is demanding the best of his team; and the woman – emotional, and must be on her period. The belief that women are bad for business is also propagated by the typical representation of women at work in pop culture: loud, gossipy, demonstrative, coddling, oversexualised or at the very least, crushing on the boss. On the other hand, the female business success stories that do get air time tend to involve women who are not feminine, not glamorous, not well-adjusted, do not have families or active social lives. In fact, she will often be described as ‘one of the boys.’
However, there are enough female entrepreneur success stories that debunk those myths. I maintain that the involvement of emotions, and more so, emotional intelligence, makes women particularly apt at entrepreneurship and leadership. According to Psychology Today, “Emotional intelligence refers to the ability to identify and manage one’s own emotions, as well as the emotions of others…it is generally said to include at least three skills: the ability to identify and name one’s own emotions; the ability to harness those emotions and apply them to tasks like thinking and problem solving; and the ability to manage emotions, which includes both regulating one’s own emotions when necessary and cheering up or calming down other people.” Of course, men are capable of honing these skills, but I would argue that the very traits that are used against women in business are what give them an advantage in this field.
Our naturally nurturing traits as women enable us to solicit the best from our team and create a work environment that is conducive to creativity, innovation and stability. Connecting our emotions also helps us to recognise the differences between the people and processes that are involved in our businesses and the specific needs of each. This can mean knowing when to strictly follow SOPs and protocols for example, and when to deviate from those policies to allow our team members to share ideas and new best practices that can improve the efficiency of our businesses. Using emotional intelligence to relate to our team will also enable us to assist them with managing business and family in a way that does not compromise productivity, but instead increases their loyalty to the company that considers their needs.
In executing Curl Fete, I’ve also found that women have a different approach to networking. That is, networking is not just a vehicle to seek support for our own businesses, but female business owners in Guyana have shown me that it is also a very beneficial doorway to collaboration and mutual support. Recognising and relating to the needs, wants and intentions in the room is the first step to positively harnessing our shared emotions and creating lasting business relationships.
Going back to my initial statement, fixing what pisses you off is also an emotional response; one that will drive you to be relentless in providing your goods/services to rectify the fault that you would have identified. Without a strong attachment and motivation, in this case emotional, you are likely to be less resilient as an entrepreneur. Curl Fete is one such business that demands an emotional attachment. A large part of the service that we provide is positivity, which cannot be quantified, packaged or sold. Through their experience at Curl Fete, our audience must believe in our message and in turn, share that message, in order for Curl Fete to grow. It is impossible for us to achieve that without injecting our own emotions and reality (many of us having experienced the negativity about natural hair and dark skin that we are fighting against) into Curl Fete. Curl Fete team members are also small business owners so we are able to relate to our vendors (our clients) and provide services, as well as an experience, that we would want for ourselves.
Therefore, intelligently managing, not suppressing our emotions, I believe is a female entrepreneur’s super power. It certainly has been mine.
